Skip to main content

Unworthy

Gen:32:10
I am unworthy of all the kindness and faithfulness you have shown your servant. 

Jacob, as fear grips his mind, whether Esau would exact his long awaited revenge on him, now there is an opportune moment, divides the family into two groups and then goes to God. 
As he comes to God, as he humbles himself, he realizes the truth of his sinfulness and realizes that whatever he has are all a gift from God and he, out of all people, is totally unworthy to receive it all. 
It is not the gift that reveals the unworthiness, but the Giver. It is not the amount he has that showed his unworthiness, but the quality of the giver. Because the giver has been gracious, he realized his unworthiness. Because the giver is holy, he realizes his sinfulness. He remembered his deceit, his lying. 
Looking back into our own lives, there were kids smarter than us, intelligent than us, talented than us, but the Lord has been gracious to us. Not the weightage of blessings or inheritance that He has given. But the fact that God has been gracious to me even when I had been unfaithful. I'm unworthy. Each of us are unworthy, because of the entity called sin. 
And when we realize this truth and humble ourselves before our Almighty God, saying I'm unworthy to receive all your blessings, unworthy to have the knowledge of You, unworthy to have You in my life as a very great reward. That is when God would bless you more. (After this we see Jacob wrestling with God and is made Israel) 

How much more should we do this faith exercise regularly. To thank God for His blessings everyday, highlighting my unworthiness and His graciousness. Above all - remember this. 
Rom:5:8 But God demonstrated his own love for us, in this. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. 

Not when I have decided to act righteously. 
Not when I have decided to change course. 
While I was still rebellious, while I was still His enemy, He died for me. 
Unworthy as I am, I come before You Father, with a grateful heart. Nothing else. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Storm

I have captained this ship for years. I have faced many a strom. But never has Captain Zadok been so helpless. What is happening? Why this outrage? The waves are higher than ten times what I have faced. There is ruckus all over this deck. The mast is broken. What is left of it is a ghost. The rudder has flewn off like a wheel. The anchor is lost. The stern is like a ploughed field. The shrouds are like harp strings, waving around and causing much damage. Shredding pieces of wood and flesh and blood everywhere it hits.There is vomit all around. The ocean water occasionally washes it into my own room and brings it back. The luggages are all floating.  All of the crew is running havoc. Captain Zadok, what should we do? Captain Zadok shall we pull down the sail? Captain Zadok shall i call on my gods? You call on your gods, I used to tell, but I have got this. But have I? Is there somebody up there laughing at the gimmicks that i have been showing althrough my life? Asking m...

Divorce

God hates divorce The same God tells husbands to love your wives as Christ loved the church. The same God tells wives to submit to your husbands. You cannot pick and chose what to obey or not. You might not be physically divorced. You might hang on because it is command to obey.  Love as Christ loved the church, unconditionally, selflessly - is also a command to obey. Even when you do not feel like loving. Be it your spouse, or children or your difficult colleague.  And if you break one, you are guilty of breaking it all.  Image credit:  https://www.shutterstock.com/search/hands-separating

Slap

How can I show my other cheek. Already he has slapped me. The world will be making fun of me already. And if I show the other cheek too I will be called a fool.  It is pride to not let go. To not let to be trampled. Jesus practised what He preached. He did not retaliate when He had all the power to do so. He could have brought fire from above and annihilated everyone who ridiculed Him. He kept quiet. He let Himself to be crushed in the hands of His own creation.  If anyone calls you names. If anyone spreads rumours about you. One side of the world says to face it and retaliate. Other side says, not to bother, to grow above it. For you are what you think what you are and not what others think. Jesus says to love those who hate you. Oh! It looks improbable. But Jesus led from the front. He loved me who ridiculed Him. He loved me who denied Him. He loved me who did not want Him.  Pray for him who spreads rumours about you. Pray for him who hurts you. It might be ...

Worry

Not to worry about everyday life.  Matt:6:25 6 times Jesus mentions the word 'worry' in Matt:6:25-34 Which means He wants to stress on the fact that worrying is utter foolishness and strikingly useless.  If you worry; it is a matter of mistrusting your Father in heaven. That He will take care isn't a reality for you.  Logically speaking, by worrying you cannot solve or alleviate your problem. Only affects your mental and emotional status.  But whereas by trusting, you are more at peace as you realize that you are in the palm of His hands and for sure, He is Jehovah Jireh and He will not leave you or forsake you.  Image credit:  https://legacyproject.human.cornell.edu/2021/05/11/worry-wastes-your-life/

Eye

Your eye is a lamp that provides light for your body.  Matt:6:22 Oh be careful little eyes what you see Oh be careful little eyes what you see The Father up above Is looking down in love.  Oh be careful little eyes what you see.  A tiny song that we learnt as children, but carries heavy significance even for us now. What goes in you either purifies you or defiles you. And the eye is the major gateway of what goes inside of you. And the phone in your hand is the highway that leads to that gateway right now. What do you feed yourself with? Search history tells it out loudly. Whether you have cleared your search history or whether it is in incognito mode or whether your watch history is off. It might be hidden to the world or to your spouse or to your children or to your friends. But apart from you there is one more person who knows it through and through. In fact spick and span. Where do your eyes wander as you walk down the street or drive down the lane? What do your eyes ...

Forgive

Forgive us our sins As we forgive others.  If God is merciful to us in the same amount we are merciful to others?  We are merciful to them for say five minutes. But God is merciful to us for years.  We forgive others and store it all in our mind. But we want God to forgive us with the delete all button.  We forgive ourselves like God forgives us. But not others. So that means it's not impossible. We can forgive without a tag. We xam forgive without being asked of.  Teach us Lord to forgive as you forgive.  Image credit: https://www.mindful.org/learn-to-forgive-others-no-matter-what/

Publicly

Matt:6:1 Don't do your good deeds publicly.  God looks at your hearts; not your hands. God looks at the motives behind your good deeds. If it is to gain appreciation and good words from others, then all the reward you will get from God will be lost.  Does self stand between you and the reward that you would get? Whom do you want to appreciate you? Don't you want to hear from the Saviour? Well done good and faithful servant.  If man's appreciation is all you desire, it is all you will get. If God's appreciation is what you desire, that is what you will get. So do everything as for God, so that people wouldn't know. Pray shutting the door behind you. Not empty babbling of words. Worship when you are alone more. Let your left hand not know what your right hand does.  Image credit: https://www.inc.com/brent-gleeson/20-tips-for-mastering-art-of-public-speaking.html