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Enslaved


Rom:6:22
Enslaved to God.

I want to be enslaved to God.
I want to do things which please God.
I want to come out of the slavery I'm stuck in.
Where I am forced to do things which I hate to do.
As a new creation, slave to righteousness I am made.
I am free indeed, but slave to God.
I want to be a man after God's own heart.
I want to be a person doing the right things.
Making the right choices.
Seeing the right things.
Hearing the right things.
Filling my heart with the right things.
I want to hate things which I once loved.
I want to resist my old master and surrender to my rightful Lord.
Reciprocate the Agape Love to me.
Unconditional love that loves me without any tags.
I want to be a man who thinks only about my God. Always.
I want to, but I am unable to.
I fall miserably again, yet again.
Creating wounds and scars around me and in me.
Scars that are difficult to heal.
Still my selfishness I pursue.
The old man forces me.
Though I need not listen to his voice.
And I need to listen to the still small voice that loves me, nurtures me.
Who allures me, my beloved.
Why can't I? 
Why do I keep listening to the boisterous enemy's voice?
Why do I keep listening to the tyrant?
When the ever present help is here.
My lover is nigh.
But I look forward to the cruel taskmaster, who is my enemy.
Whence my King, my lover is near. He is with me.
How foolish?
Yet again I failed.
Yet again I have disappointed.
But still He loves me.
Still He helps me.
But still He allures me to His bosom.
Help me to trust in You alone Oh! My Father.

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